Adarlan's Assasian

*meekly waves*
Heeeeeey guys


I'm sorry.
I lack, I know I do.
Instead of dwelling on my poor updates, lets focus on a heart stopping and action packed series that has transformed me. Seriously. In weak moments I whisper to myself 'What would Celeana do?'
Celeana Sardothian, the protagonist of Throne of Glass.. Even her name exudes coolness.
Celeana is the most feared assassin in the City of Adarlan, ruled by a tyrannical king of whose arbitrary evilness we learn later. These inspiring books have one thing in common, its the same every time. From the Harry Potter series to George Martins A song of ice and fire. They expand on the nitty gritty details. These authors have thought about everything. There are no loopholes because the authors have crafted the world so perfectly. Everything builds up and the authors have meticulously paid attention to every aspect of the world they have invented. Something you notice in the beginning of a series may make sense halfway through the third book. It all slots together and there's nothing better than piecing the information and fist pumping the air whilst whisper screaming YEAH YEAH YEAH (because you don't want your mum to bang on the wall at 3 in the morning)
Sarah J Maas has executed this perfectly. The world that she's created deserves a never-ending series. It's all the things that add up. Back to Celeana. Celeana is part of the Assassin's Keep in which some of the best Assassins in the whole kingdom reside under the watchful eye of Abrobbyn. Don't be fooled. Abrobbyn isn't the Sensei, nor is he some Yoda. He's a man in his thirties that makes little kids dangle from windows 50 feet above the ground to exercise control. He also has no qualms about beating them black and blue. We hear some of the stories Celeana's been through and they are not pretty. She's been through a lot to come out top. Although he's a misogynistic pig, he's still fond of Celeana and there's always a weird kind of tension between them. He's willing to indulge her with her expensive taste in dresses and jewellery as long as she kills all the targets from clients. All we learn about her background in the first book is that Celeana was found abandoned and unconscious at age 7 in the woods. Alongside Celeana serves Sam, another Assassin.
(*sobs wretchedly in the corner but can't really explain why without spoilers goddammit*)
The first book starts off with Celeana almost escaping one of the harshest prison slave camps in the kingdom. The salt mines of Endovier. Imagine a concentration camp. Laboured to the death in barbaric conditions. Slacking for more than a minute is unheard of but Celeana nearly did the impossible. She fought her way past the inhumane soldiers in the mines and had reached the border. The punishment that followed was savage.
We don't learn why or what Celeanas doing there. Shortly after, the King of Adarlan sends his son, Prince Dorian to retrieve Celeana. She is to take part in a brutal and bestial competition on who wins the title of the Kings Hand, the kings personal assassin. They offer her a irresistible bargain. If she does win the competition after serving as the King's hand for a certain number of years, her name would be cleared and she would be given freedom. In the nail-biting and fiery competition that ensues, we meet Chaol, the captain of the guard. A dedicated soldier and best friend to the prince.He trains Celeana and helps her to top the ranks. Not that she needs that much training anyway seeing as she is the best assassin in Adarlan, and doesn't she know it. A budding romance slowly blossoms between them. Her composed and standoffish attitude is to ward people away, but her genuine character shines through as the story progresses. One of the main things that makes this series legendary is character development. We see a very superficial girl at the beginning of the series, one who's determined to prove shes the best. She slowly morphs into a girl with something to loose, She makes friends, among them Princess Nehemia, a representative from another country so that peace would be retained. She flourishes with the new found relationships and the way she lets down her barriers but still manages to uphold the airs of mystery and danger is phenomenal. With a bit of trouble from Wyrd creatures and dark magic Celeana becomes the kings right hand. (WE BLOODY KNEW IT)
Obviously there had to be a few complications on the way BUT iv'e already revealed 79.6% of the plot so read it guys, honestly. I cannot praise this book enough. Its a total 5 kick ass stars from me.
Stay tuned for the review of the second book, Crown of Midnight for even more kick-ass-ery. (I'm sorry. That was painful)

A Watty to remember

Right, lets get one thing straight. I am all about the books. The pages, old or new, the spine, stiff or cracked, the state, weathered or pristine.
There's that buzzing feel in your hand that you get when you start that book you've been wanting for so long and it FINALLY arrives from amazon. Or perhaps you've been saving up, waiting until your mum takes you to WHsmith or Waterstones after days of begging with a list in your coat pocket because let's face it, it's been so long since you last went that it's shameful. Amazon is clearly the option for me :'(
 Maybe you even go to the library and you get ecstatic when you find out that the book you have craved after for oh-so-long is sitting on the shelf (this never works out for me. I cannot give them back. My deprived self needs them)
 I have never been one for kindles or audio books or whatever else they have come up with. BUT there is an exception.
I used to mock this creation before. It was an endless void filled with indistinguishable cliches and monotonous narratives, but that was before I had found 'them'. Prized possessions that inhabit the first row of my library. Constant updates are a thing to thrive off. You got it.
Wattpad.
This, ladies and gentlemen, is a review for one of the best books I have read on Wattpad.
'Illegal my ass'
Don't get put off my readers, for although the title may be like any other overrated story in the history of Watty's, this, I guarantee, is a game changer.
I want to start off by saying never have I ever laughed so much when reading a story (since Louise Renninson of course, that legend) The tears of laughter kept streaming down, so much so that I had to put my phone away and lay down for a while to get calm.. Quiet simply put, 'makeandoffer' is a literary genius and if she doesn't want to write, she should try stand-up comedy.
If you're not in it for the laughs, try the intense characters. The way she makes the plot so unpredictably remarkable. The story flows with wit, humor and general awesomeness.
Mia Hastings, after all, was never one to follow the rules. Shes a genuine and likable character. If she was a word, she would be Y.O.L.O. She lives in the moment and just goes with it along with her best friend, Lacey Richards. Her father works abroad and so she lives with her older brother, Nate. With no parental figure in the house, Mia is...unrestrained. Her hobbies include throwing paint filled ahem 'balloons' at cheerleader squads, occasionally shop lifting and sometimes giving boys she likes hypothermia for kissing another girl (understandable) Oh, and she also nearly skewered a boys left nut once. She's pretty bad ass.
  
                                    "Maybe cos your hands were exploring more than Dora. 

I wouldn't have minded but Dora had a map and a compass 

so she knew where she was going. You, on the other hand were

 like a tourist in the center of London. 

Lost as a f******* fiddle"

And here's when Drake comes in.
Drake is her brothers best friend who has been in jail for the past two years. What made me love this story the most was probably his enigmatic character.

"Listen Hastings, just because I spent the last two years

 of my life in a sausage fest does not mean

 I wave the pink flag loud and proud" 

He's known for being the bad boy, a womaniser and he parties hard. No matter how cliche that sounds, don't give up. YOU WILL END UP WITH STOMACH CRAMPS.
When Mia and Drake meet for the first time in two years, both with devil-may-care attitudes,unresolved issues of their own and more secrets than an episode of PLL, you can expect a story brimming with laughs, tears, fights and felonies. Overall, a 4.5 stars.

Read on guys, read on.

When it feels wrong, it's always more right